Planned VS. Reality

Here's what was planned:

Friday (9/5/08)--Normal school and work day planned. Later, Aaron's mom (who lives in Florida and came out for the baby blessing) would be staying overnight and going with us to the Temple Saturday morning.

Saturday (9/6)--We were to leave the house by 6:30 am and spend the whole day at the temple. The girls were going to help with child care while we helped the youth with baptisms and then did an endowment session and then finish the afternoon witnessing a couple in our ward get sealed to each other.

Sunday (9/7)--We would be attending the Brownsburg Ward @ 1 p.m. for Stevie's baby blessing. Afterward, all the Vails were to come to our house for dinner.

Monday (9/8)--A regular day at work & school... I would be preparing for surgery on Tuesday. I would make sure the girls' backpacks were packed, lunches in the fridge ready to go, and school clothes laying out. We would have a regular FHE lesson and I'd have Aaron give me a priesthood blessing in preparation for the surgery.

Tuesday (9/9)--I was supposed to be at the Indiana Surgery Center by 7:30 a.m. to prep for my 9 a.m. surgery. Aaron would be taking me to surgery and my Mom had agreed to come over at 7 to get the girls ready for school and on the buses. I'd already made arrangements with my YW presidency--they knew I wouldn't be at church this evening. But, I planned for Aaron to be able to take Vicki to Activity Days--I would just be home recovering.

And here is what really happened:

Friday--Aaron's mom couldn't stay with Tim & Jenny because Tim had come down with strep. She needed me to come get her, but I was in a presidency meeting. Aaron left work, got his mom, and they stayed here all day Friday. I showed up later that afternoon, after having lunch with Wendy at BJ's (great restaurant!). Luckily they were both asleep when I got home, so I took advantage and took a nap, too, after cleaning the bathrooms. We tried to get to bed early, but it was tough. I got the van packed with temple clothes and activity bags. Then, we got the call that Tim was in the hospital. His throat was swollen shut and they weren't so sure it was strep. They were keeping him overnight and running more tests in the morning. Jenny was so upset and to add to the fun, she got pulled over for a headlight being burned out. So, Aaron and Mom Vail left for Brownsburg to stay with Jenny, help with Stevie, and give Tim a blessing.
It was a long night... Aaron called around 1 a.m. to check in and Vicki woke up and wondered where Grandma was and cried when I told her what was going on. She was very upset we weren't going to the temple. Bridget woke up at 4 a.m. to go to the bathroom.
And, all this time, I had started to bleed again. That figures, really--I finally decide to take control of the situation and get surgery scheduled and my body decides to remind me that it is in control and began to try to complete the miscarriage naturally on its own. It wasn't heavy, so I didn't let it worry me too much... although I will admit I was a little bit terrified about maybe being in the temple in all white and the bleeding getting heavier...

Saturday--We didn't make it to the temple. The girls were both very upset. But, they did get to spend some nice quality time with their grandma. We went to the park most of the afternoon. The weather was gorgeous. I wasn't feeling 100% and attributed it to having the miscarriage, but it still wasn't really bad. Dan & Tricia came to pick Debbie up to stay with them and we went out to grab dinner, ate it by the big water-fountain at the mall, then walked over to Barnes & Noble and had a great time in the bookstore.

Sunday--Everything went as planned. Only two glitches: I accidentally turned the crock pot to "warm" instead of "high", so I had to bust a move to get the chicken cooked when we got back from church.
And, the miscarriage had gotten heavier and I was cramping pretty bad--I was pretty miserable. I knew I'd need to call the doctor in the morning.

Monday--The girls went to school and Aaron to work as normal. I called the doctor and left a message saying I could most likely cancel the surgery for tomorrow morning because I had been bleeding all weekend and obviously was having the miscarriage on my own and didn't need the D&C. I went to have lunch with Aaron and the nurse called me back while I was out with him--the doctor wanted me to come in for yet another ultrasound.
He went ahead and canceled the surgery, but told me it was possible I'd still need to have it later. I told him that I didn't feel right, that I'd been shaky all day. We thought maybe I was anemic because of the miscarriage, so he ordered blood work for me. Well, I don't know if it was the internal ultrasound and/or the exam, but once Dr. Salazar left the exam room and I got up to get dressed, I began to bleed very heavily and passed a couple clots. I was frantic, trying to clean myself up and not leave a big mess in the exam room. I'd accidentally left my celtic wedding ring behind.
I drove myself to Community Hospital for my blood work. I barely made it to the bathroom in the ER area--I had passed a huge blood clot about the size of a tennis ball. I called the doctor's office from the bathroom in a fit of tears. They said the blood clots were normal, not to worry, but to call if I had any other questions. Well, I could not get the bleeding to stop long enough to leave the bathroom. I was in there for over an hour, crying, bleeding, passing enormous blood clots.
I called Aaron and he left work and came to my rescue (his car is still at Community Hospital as I type). He talked to me until he found me and came into the bathroom with a wheelchair to get me out. He wheeled me to the lab for my blood work, then took me home after picking up my ring I left at the office. In the short time it took to get home, I bled through a pad, my undergarments, and my shorts. I tried to get to the toilet, but blood went everywhere and I dropped another big clot on the bathroom floor. Graphic, I know. Can you imagine living it? I came completely unglued. I was sobbing. Aaron called the doctor for me. I was filling a pad every 10 minutes.
Dr. Salazar sent us to ER. My mom met us at the hospital and took the girls overnight. They did more blood work (the work I'd already done about an hour earlier was sent away). After several hours, they gave me a very painful shot in my butt muscle to try to control the bleeding. I was to follow-up with some pills that would also help with the bleeding. They gave me a script for pain meds for the cramping. I got home around 11:30 that night. My sweet husband took me through the drive-through since I hadn't eaten, and then after dropping me off at home, went back out to buy all the embarrassing supplies I'd need to deal with the bleeding overnight.
So much for FHE.

Tuesday--Mom brought the girls home for school, but Aaron let them stay home since they hadn't gotten much sleep. The doctor's office called and asked me to come in. I told them I was too tired, couldn't we do it tomorrow. LOL They politely told me I needed to come in right away. Dr. Salazar didn't like what he saw in yet another ultrasound (this had become a daily thing for me) and asked me when I ate last. He scheduled me for surgery at 4:00. I had two hours to go home and take a shower and get the girls ready and find a sitter and get a blessing from Aaron. Tricia was wonderful and took care of the girls. But, Vicki didn't get to go to Activity Days. I had to be at the Indiana Surgery Center by 2:30 for prep. I've never had surgery before, so I was scared. But, they were wonderful people there. They took very good care of me.
Once I got over the anesthetic, I felt fabulous! I was elated to be able to go to the bathroom and there wasn't any blood! I wanted to shout it from the rooftops! Times like these, you totally grasp the "opposition in all things" principle. By the time I got home, my throat began to hurt from the tube they put down my throat during surgery, and I had some mild discomfort, but I was still so happy to be on the road to recovery and getting past all this.

Wednesday--I slept all day. I was (and still am) completely exhausted. Taking a shower takes up all my energy I saved up for all day while sleeping. And my hormones are a complete mess. I'll leave that for another post... Aaron's employer was kind enough to send a beautiful plant to our home. Aaron took the day off to stay with me. In a few weeks, once this is all behind me, I will be tested for a bleeding disorder.

Thursday--Aaron went back to work. I got the girls on the bus for school and I felt like I was gonna die. My whole body was shaking by the time it was over. I took some pain pills and went to bed for the rest of the day.

Friday--Here we are. This is real time now. Aaron helped get the girls on the bus before he left for work, thank goodness. He is so wonderful. I really don't know what I'd do without him. I feel sick and shaky. Once I publish this post (which took me two days to write), I'm back to bed, and probably for the whole day again. I felt so good right after surgery that I didn't expect to go through this days later. I'm just exhausted... when will I get back to "normal" again?


Here is my little personal pharmacy. Well, three of those I already have on a regular basis. One was to help stop bleeding. One is my antibiotic after surgery. And I have three different pain pills to choose from.


Here's the beautiful plant Aaron's employer sent to our home. I thought that was so thoughtful of them!